iamnotmyfather | You are NOT my father [Locked to adm_chris

"I recall telling you that as long as you were on this ship you belonged to me. You stay in these quarters and you sleep in the same bed as Jim and I do. Therefore, I am your Master until I decide to either free you or give you to someone else and I doubt the second it ever going to happen." he took the cuffs from James and secured them to the boy's wrists, jerking the boy a little more to secure the cuffs to the s-hook in the room. He took the whip from James next and set it to one side.

"I'm giving you a few minutes to think about what you've done and then I'll be back." He was giving the boy alone time with James while he went and changed clothes...

He jerks at the cuffs, glaring at Pike's retreating back but it lacked conviction. Those eyes turn to his older self, even as he jerks on the cuffs a bit more. "He can't do this." He's trying to be brave but he's scared out of his mind. "It isn't right."

"He wouldn't have to if you'd of just listened to him. If you wanted to have fun, you should've said something to us and we'd of all gone together."

He listens to his boy talking to the younger version of himself as he changes out of his tunic and pants and into more civillian clothing. He will give them a few more minutes but then he'll have James leave. There's not need for his slave to be here for this. The younger boy needs to know that only Pike controls what happens here; not Jim.

"You two are older then me, you two don't know fun." James states, the teenager had that view on things. "He can't do this. He's not my father."

"He's the only family we have, James." Jim says softly. "You'll learn to appreciate him. He's better then Frank."

Pike stops for a moment not sure of what to say to that... or even think for that matter. James had never told him that before... gods... was he really better than Frank? Didn't he do basically the same as that monster had done to the boys? He stood there in shock for a moment, not quite sure what to do now...

"How the hell is he better then Frank?" The teen snaps. "All he does is hurt you."

"That's where you're wrong, James." Jim says with a small smile. "There's a big difference between him and Frank. That difference being that the Admiral actually cares and he shows it. Even after the punishments, he holds me. Everything is normally forgiven, a clean slate. Like I said, he's better then Frank."

That seems to sober Pike up a little bit more and he's able to take a shaky breath and finish dressing. Jim's right. He does care. He has to remember to make that point to the younger boy. He returns to the room and lays a hand on his boy's shoulder.

"Jim, you need to go," he says quietly. "This is between myself and James..."

"That's not..." James starts, giving a low frown.

"You'll see." Jim says, though he frowns a bit when he's told to go, but he nods and kisses his Master. Once he's done that, he heads down to bother Bones. He knows that his Master will know where he's gotten off to.

Pike waits for the door to close before he turns back to James.

"I want you to know that I don't do this just to hurt you, James. I do this because I care about you; about your well being and your safety and I just want you to be a better person and running around getting into trouble, drinking underage, getting tattooed, etcetera, isn't going to help you. Now. Let's try this the easy way one more time. Just... tell me what you did wrong, tell me you're sorry for it and this can be a lot easier than it's going to be otherwise."

That gets a slight laugh out of the teen, he's trying to hold back the tears, the fear of the whole matter. "I don't think it'd be a lot easier, because you'd still end up hurting me." But if all he had to do was apologize... Not that he believed this man cared for his safety. Just Jim's not his.

"I will punish you, yes," Pike said softly as he moved around in front of James. "You deserve that for what you did, especially for running off without telling us where you're going. But it doesn't have to be as bad as it would be right now. Just... admit that what you did was wrong, James. You know it was... you are scared to death right now and I don't blame you. But I do care about you and not just because of Jim, either. I care about you and I do not want you to get into trouble or taken away from me or this ship because once that happens, I can't protect you from other Masters who will only use you because of your name."

More like beat me. He thinks, his eyes going to the whip before looking back at the Admiral. We're sure that Jim would say the whip was a bit much considering his younger self's age, but he'd not say it to his Master's face. "Fine, I was wrong. I fucked up. That what you want to hear? Because Frank sure as hell loved hearing it before beating me."

Pike has to step back for a moment, closing his eyes and counting to ten mentally before speaking.

"I am not Frank," he growls out. "Nor am I anything like him. I never have been and I never will be. Is that what you think of me, James? You think I'm no better than your step father who looked for any and every reason to beat you down or sexually abuse you? That's really what you think? Guess it's what my own Jim thinks as well, huh?" He shakes his head and moves, throwing the whip back into the chest it came from before he moves and unhooks James from the s-hook.

"You know what, fine. Go ahead and do whatever yuo want then if that's the way you want things to be. Sleep wherever you want, with whomever you want. Get drunk, get yourself marked up by someone you don't know with marks that don't mean a fucking thing. Get yourself lost on some god-forsaken planet where no one will know where you are and get left behind for someone like Komack to get their hands on you. Then you'll fucking wish you'd listened to me. So, fine. Go. I won't be likened to a man who never gave a damn for you or loved you when I could give you ten times the amount of love and care he ever could." He turns his back on James then and stormed out of his quarters, not even caring that his own Jim was standing just outside.

James watches him before rubbing his wrists after he's unhooked. But the words that the Admiral were throwing at him makes it feel like he'd just put sucker punched or worse. He didn't think it would hurt so much to have someone say something like that. For the longest time, he stays put right where he's at, stunned to where he can't do a thing.

Reaching up he angrily wipes away the tears, then turns and heads out after the Admiral, even if he doesn't know what the hell to say. But he isn't going anywhere, he's not... "I don't want to go." He hates that it sounds so damn small. He doesn't want to be left behind somewhere and he doesn't want to leave his older self or the Admiral. He just... he doesn't know anything more then the pain that Frank caused him and he can't see someone else caring.

Pike stops mid-stride as he hears the boy's voice behind him. He doesn't turn around yet, though. He's still hurting and trying to calm himself down. Footsteps tell him that his own Jim has probably followed as well.

"Then what do you want, James?" he asks evenly.

James doesn't like that even tone, it reminds him too much of... God, he frowns and closes his eyes so he doesn't have to see their faces. Or at least so he doesn't have to see his older self's face. It's quiet but...

"I want to stay with you two."

Pike seems to relax a little with those words and he finally turns around to look at the boy carefully.

"Are you going to follow my rules?

Those blue eyes open a little and he watches the Admiral. This was harder then he thought, really damn hard. But he bites his bottom lip nice and hard, still trying to hold back those tears.

"Yes."

Better start this off right then...

"Yes what, James?"

James bites his inner jaw nice and hard making sure he tasted blood, not used to any of this. Not used to having someone give a shit about what he did or didn't do either. It was all too weird to him.

"Yes, sir."

Pike stepped closer to him and pulled the boy into his arms, resting his chin on top of the boy's head.

"Very good," he whispered softly, rubbing on hand up and down the boy's back as he met his own boy's gaze with his own. What could he say? He knew he needed to talk to Jim about Frank... about what his lover had said... but not now. It was still too new.

"All right then, boy, back to our quarters. We have something to finish I think. And not with cuffs or whips either. I'll keep it simple this time."

James merely takes in the way it feels to have arms wrapped around him like that, the way those hands felt... Although the next words have him feeling like he's going to get sick. Though at the mention of not using the cuffs or whips, it was kind of a relief.

So he turns and heads back towards their quarters.

"Do you want me to go back down to Bones, sir?" Jim asks watching the two of them.

Pike watches James before turning back to his own boy.

"Yes. You need to stay there until I send for you, boy. I don't want you hanging around outside the doorway this time. Understood?"

Jim gives a slight nod. "Understood, sir." He gives his younger self a small smile before leaving and heading down to Bones and his own boy.

Pike shakes his head and follows James inside his quarters, closing the door behind them.

"I'll keep this simple," he says quietly, "but don't expect me to do so again. Tomorrow we'll discuss an outline of rules I expect you to follow. Jim will fill you in on anything else. For now, though, you need to strip and kneel by the bed."

You are NOT my father [Locked to adm_chris_pike]

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